2018 - A Year in Review
Updated: Jan 7, 2019
What a year 2018 has been for Kat Black - Tough, fun, courageous, messy, creative, adventurous - genuinely overall a fucking fantastic year. Is it fair to chalk it up to giving up alcohol? Ah, ya. AND, I believe there’s always been something deep inside me searching for more. A commodity more valuable than what I was offering myself.
To say I am appreciative of how far I’ve come in a year is an understatement. It just reflects how much I was missing in my life and how much room I had to grow (and still do). This year, I have repaired old friendships and created new & real connections with people I never would have had the opportunity to meet. I have started to value myself with a currency that never existed before. I’m in the process of setting boundaries and understanding that the word “No” isn’t necessarily bad, especially when it’s in line with my integrity. I have begun to reconnect with my body and the messages it presents to me. I’ve initiated spending solid quality time with myself and although it can still be overwhelming & intimidating, I trust myself and know I have my best interest at heart, and that makes all the difference in the world.
I can say this with 100% certainty - none of this could not have been possible had alcohol still been present in my life. Not even a fucking drop. That poison had become this deep, thick, resonating fog that saturated every aspect of my life, and wouldn’t let me live a real existence. Maybe you feel suffocated by the grasp alcohol has on your life. Maybe it doesn’t quite have that type of hold on you but feel you could do without. Maybe you think I’m full of shit and will continue to drink because that’s your choice. AND you’re still reading this post. Awesome.
All I can share with you is my story & experience, and that is my life without alcohol became what I always wished it could be. Bawling my eyes out, snot dripping out of my nose, drunk as fuck on my friend’s floor at 4am thinking I wasn’t good enough, definitely not smart enough, wouldn’t amount to anything, whatever, was once the way I lived my life. As Caroline Knapp would say “Alcohol makes everything better, until it makes everything worse.” A lot can change in the matter of a year. I’ve worked as hard as a person can work who wants their life back, who would walk through fire to make their life the best it can possibly be.
In looking to 2019, I’ll say this - I’m not a ‘resolutions’ type of girl. I’m changing & evolving all the time, doesn’t matter what time of the year. My hope for this year though is that it will bring on new forms of learning, growth, love, connection & accomplishments. And I wish that for you too. I truly do. You deserve so much better. A better life, sense of worth, value, love, trust & connection. xo K